I cannot go back. I can only go forward. Love is like that, I’ve found. It is always in constant motion. Preparation for the next step that often looks like loss, is providing open space for what is new and full of life. A relationship morphs and leaves one feeling bereft and then another comes and creates more understanding of wholeness than any other could possibly have done. And I am well.
The Maker not only moves cows, it seems, but people and families as well, to provide homes for the heart.
Changes in world view can prove challenging in the context of culture and family. It only takes a difference in perspective to cause division. One can read the same book, draw a different conclusion about its context, believe it to contain truth passionately, and yet be utterly wrong. The difficulty is that humans have been conditioned to read with an external template. We don’t search for truth, we judge it based on our cultural, religious, and personal experiential templates. Our assumption about the origins of our thoughts, and those in our community who may morph away from them in favour of a different paradigm create an innate tension. There is fear there… So many books have been written about the dangers of labelling a person, the ostracization, the mental health problems, the simple act of rejecting a person based on differing beliefs.
But if our beliefs are solid, and we are certain, why is the simple act of someone changing their mind so threatening? Why does it have the power to entirely destroy relational intimacy? Obliterate trust? Divide families? Why, under the pretext of understanding, does the line of questioning inevitably move into the realm of attempting to unconvert the one altered and regain their status as “one of us” instead of delving into what made them change in the first place. If they arrived at their conclusions after a point where want has always been done proved to them to be an epic failure at sustaining life or stimulating growth, and they have successfully changed into a more palatable human because of it, what are we not insanely curious? What changed?
We’ve all met that person who has a tale that could be titled “I am not as I have been.” Their story is most often a tale fraught with peril or adversity and laced with personal epiphanies. We hire them as motivational speakers for conventions and leadership conferences. Hold retreat weekends with them in hopes that their vibrancy and way of life will rub off on us and we too will become shiny. But when such an individual rises from our own ranks, we carefully cordon ourselves off from them and find they are radical and dangerous. O, the irony! We would rather maintain our doldrums and status quo and our traditions, hang on to our beliefs as though they are God himself, and not a system of ideology based on man’s interpretation of them (this can also apply to cultural and political connections), than find out what it was that brought about such marked change in one who was once so close and agreeable. Because, heaven forbid, I cannot explore, let alone agree, because I have already declared my allegiance to another line of thought.
We forget that at the beginning of religious and cultural shifts, there have always been forerunners of a questionable nature. What you consider to be ancient thought, true ancient thought would find to be untested and in its infantile stages. Truth may not change, but our perspective on it may. Religion and science have long been a balance to each other, provoking exploration. It stands to reason that as we grow more connected in our world, the fields of study will also begin to overlap, giving solid evidence for that which was at one time a mystical stymie. Even Spiritual experiences have become the fodder of studious examination, because the inexplicable, or miraculous begs for definition. Humanity, in this post religious scientific era, is once again exploring the metaphyisical. We want to know.
Inquiring minds want to know. And why do I bring that up? Man, created in the image of God, who created us, and knows all things and gave us unlimited access, not only to his life but his mind, wants to journey into all truth and know and be known by the Maker. It is within our make-up to search the deep things of God, to desire not the hypothetical abstract truth, but the workable, interactive reality consciousness and awareness bring to life.
If a car stops working, we replace it. If a dishwasher ceases to function, we replace it. If an animal dies, we bury it, and let it go. If a friendship or a marriage becomes dysfunctional, we either attempt to change its patterns or let it go. If we cannot physically or mentally get well, we subject ourselves to both diagnosis, and treatment, and often change our location to hospitalization in order to become well. We may even change habits and lifestyle to maintain the level of wellness we acquire during the period of healing. When two people of different cultures begin personal or working relationships, they may have to compromise, or leave components of their upbringing in order succeed at remaining connected.
Why, then, is it so unbelievable that one may need to change one’s perspective on God, or Spiritual life in order to become well? If the religious template is not a functional model producing life as it advertises, but there is still a desire to remain connected to the Deity one claims faith in, why is it almost worse to change how one reads a book than it would be if one denied there was any truth in it at all? Why are the consequences of spiritual exploration so severe? Especially, if one begins to see results. How can belief that did not serve a person, only wounded them further and made them feel innately defeated, now let go, and replaced with the fruit of the Spirit and the abundant, joyful life preached by both Christ and Paul, be so dangerous that the traditional statement of faith is allowed to trump intimate relationships.
It should be possible to leave religion, keep God, and keep the Bible. To be tied to the Bible, only as it is currently viewed by the religious sect you adhere to is to replace a free range Creator with a dried out, boxed version, with less free will than the beings he created. What if in this day, God is doing a new thing, that truly will be truth that sets free the captives, and your adherence to tradition has you in a holding pattern.
You won’t know if you label before you look. You won’t, you can’t. If what you have doesn’t feel like freedom, and someone you know is talking, walking, and living differently, and it looks like freedom, ask them them questions like they are a motivational speaker at a conference. Even if they are your family. You may find, that in the changes of their life are the desired goals of your own. And you may also find that growth, of all kinds, has an uncomfortable, untraditional beginning. Unless a grain of wheat fall to the ground, and DIE, it will bare no fruit. No one wants to whither. And what if we have always believed a lie. What if?
I am not as I have been. Are you?